I have an ache in my stomach. It's a gnawing twinge of something forgotten, I left it behind. I didn't turn it off...
what was it?
Did I leave a light on?
a door left unlocked?
A window left open?
Shit.
What Is it?
That twinge is growing, the anxiety is building. ..
What! What did I leave behind? What didn't I do?
Oh.
Oh I get it now.
Damn.
It's not a door left unlocked or a light on, The windows are all closed.
I have everything good & packed.
That gnawing feeling, that ache in my stomach.
That bad feeling...
It's you. It's you not being here. It's me leaving without you. It's everything good that I've left behind.
It's staying up late and laughing, it's your bumpy carpets & grumpy greetings, It’s your yummy dinners & dessert every night, It’s shouting over headphones & reminders of recycling, Its blueberries, warm oatmeal & toasted raisin bread, it's hellos, good morning & goodnights...
Its everything that is still there, it’s everything that I will be missing - It’s you. It’s him. It’s her & it’s them.
It’s family.
And it’s the everything that I’ve left behind.
